Scarred and scared

Too scarred
   to be interested
   in trying time and one again
Too scared
    to be left
      time and one again
    with pieces
    that once formed a heart
      -one now wroth with scars
       old wounds
             old they may be 
             but no less wounds
 I have this big… massive closed heart
 I keep it to myself
 I give it to none
Though sometimes….
it is given away to one
or another
without my knowledge
this big … massive closed heart
slips away,
   unbeknown to me
and returns
on a day…
  – any day such as is called today
in a state of peril
   running scared
   with new wounds
  – the would-be …scars